Ramadan and counting down

Yesterday I enjoyed my last day of work! It was relatively low-key. There weren't too many customers, so I had a nice leisurely evening with my coworkers. I sure will miss those people!

I've now been fasting for a week. It isn't fun, exactly, to fast, but it is tremendously enlightening. My first experience with Ramadan was back in 2006, during my first excursion to Turkey. I only fasted for a day but was shocked to discover how proud I was of my abstinence. I felt like I was participating in something bigger than myself; little did I know how that feeling would stick with me three years later.

The following year, my first year in college, I fasted for the whole month. I told myself that I was only going to do it to see if I could. Sure enough, I did it. Again, I was overcome with a sense of accomplishment and pride. I realize now, after a couple more years with it, that fasting isn't about pride. We do it because it is humbling, and it is asked of us. I find it to be a reminder of the human condition. Many are without the luxury of eating 3+ times a day. I can say with confidence that I understand how it feels to be hungry. Certainly, I've never gone hungry for months or years. I've never struggled to make ends meet. I've never been forced to live on the street. But Ramadan is a good start. It is a time to help us remember the gifts in our lives and how easily those can be taken away. It's a time for introspection and dedication, for learning and reading the Qur'an and growing as a spiritual person. Ramadan teaches us submission, which is really the heart of Islam.

This year, I feel a lot smarter. The first year I truly fasted (2007), I was excited to talk about it with everyone. I made sure the people around me knew what I was doing. I had no idea of the religious elements of fasting; I just wanted to be doing something different. I did get involved with DU's MSA, but I never really stuck with the group. The second year I fasted, I was working full time and wasn't waking up before Fajr to eat breakfast. As a result, even though I wanted to be fasting, I ended up feeling weak and dizzy. Since I was working sometimes 10 or 11 hours a day, my health and well being were really starting to deteriorate. I decided to not complete the fast, only making it through a couple of weeks.

This year, I feel more humble. I try not to talk about it; I feel like excessive excitement about fasting can detract from the introspective, spiritual element of it. I'll certainly answer questions posed by my coworkers and friends, but I'm not shoving it in anyone's face. I'm also taking care to wake up and eat breakfast, so that I have the energy to stay upright during the day. This is particularly important, as having low energy makes it more difficult to be kind to oneself and one's surroundings. I find that I still start crashing in the early afternoon, but not to the extent that I was last year. I still don't have a good grasp on the religious aspect, but I'm getting there. I frequently find myself whispering some of the shorter surahs of the Qur'an to myself during lulls at work in an attempt to memorize them. I can almost complete a prayer on my own, relying minutely on my books to guide me. I anticipate that next year will be even more spiritually enriching for me, and I'm very excited for it. I'll try to read more of my Qur'an in the upcoming days.

I have about 2.5 days left until September 2. I've received some more information from my university in Turkey. It looks like I'll be in the political science department. I hope this won't adversely affect my desire to take international relations classes. I'll find that out the week of Sept. 11. I go in on the 11th to register, so I will (hopefully) find out more about class selection then. We have a 6 hour orientation on the 7th. I'm not quite pleased about the length of time, but I am glad it's shorter than the two-day orientations many of my friends are enduring.

Speaking of my friends, I believe that all but one has departed. It's been tough to say goodbye to so many all at once! Kyle is in Denmark, Cameron is in Russia, and Jenn is stranded in Japan for the moment. They all left within a week of each other, so it's been pretty dull for the last couple of days. My buddy Scott leaves in a couple of weeks, so I can only imagine that he's feeling pretty bummed as well. There is one girl from DU going with me to Turkey. It'll be nice to have someone nearby to talk to and hang out with. I'm excited to show her around.

In the next few days, I'll be packing and narrowing down my lists. I'm trying to find the perfect airplane playlist and reading list; it's much easier said than done! Hopefully I'll have a chance to try out my video editing software so I can start posting some vlogs. I have recorded a couple of short clips for it (mostly they're me staring at the camera and making weird faces, but it's a start), so if you're interested in that, stay tuned!

limbo

So I've returned from my trip to Seattle! Overall, it was an excellent trip. There was far too much hooliganism than I'm used to here in Colorado, but I had fun. Mostly Grant and I stayed on the island, only venturing into the city on a couple of occasions. My hair appointment was wonderful; Lish is a great woman and a lot of fun to be around. While it was long overdue, I found that the tidiness into which she forced my loose hairs didn't last very long. By the next night I was noticing the little fuzzies popping out. I'm sure most of that was due to my excessive pillow burrowing.

Grant and I spent the week catching up, smoking hookah, and generally being bums. There was lots of youtube watching, lots of drunk song singing, and much facebook stalking. I met many of his friends and was pleased to introduce him to one of mine, Roy. I believe I mentioned Roy in my previous post; he's one of my oldest friends. I had the pleasure of flying him out to Seattle and showing him around for a few days. He partook in many of our shenanigans and inspired many of his own. I introduced him to falafal and The Stars. We rode on the ferry as often as possible and exchanged gushy promises about the future. After a particularly stressful day, we even indulged in a classy dinner at the Space Needle! I took some video to potentially kick off my vlog, but it may not be posted.

So now I'm 17 days away from my flight. I'm beginning to accumulate the necessary body care items I'll be bringing (10 months worth of vitamins, face wash, and moisturizer is not only expensive but really effing heavy!). I'm getting concerned that it won't all fit into my one suitcase. Consequently I'm thinking about taking two bags. What sort of a diva does that make me, if I need an entire suitcase for my shampoo and conditioner? We'll see. I may have to sacrifice convenience for more suitcase room. Perhaps my mother can mail me a five month supply once I get settled in. Also, taking school supplies will be spacious. I was never able to find an appropriate office supply store while I was in Turkey before. I'm going to bring some of my own and hope to find the rest somewhere! So what is really happening is this: I'm compromising my limited luggage room by bringing lots of toiletries and school supplies. Will I be able to pack everything I think I need without having to pay for any extra weight? Will I have to take two bags or have a package sent midway through the year?

Ramadan is coming up in less than a week (approximately). I tried to fast last year, but between full time work and full time school, I found myself starved and weak. I'll try again this year and hope it goes more smoothly. Since I'll be traveling, I won't be required to stick with the fast for at least two days. We'll see how it goes. What was one year an amazing experience ended up being terrible the next. I hear it's been really hot in Istanbul, so it might be really difficult. Long, hot days and not eating or drinking? Sounds like trouble!

I don't know what else to say! I want to try to pack my suitcase early to make sure I can fit what I need. Now that airlines are charging for everything, I want to be prepared!

here we go again

On September 2, 2009, I will be embarking on the second half of a grand adventure.

It all started in 2006 when I decided, as a junior in high school, to spend my senior year abroad. After a few unexpected turns of event, I ended up studying in Turkey for the ten month academic year. The year was full of adventure and education; upon return to the US in July of 2007, I had become a certified turkophile, gobbling up whatever opportunities I had to read about, talk about, think about, and revisit the country as often as they were presented.

Now as a junior in college, I've been given the chance to study abroad for a second time. For much of my final quarter of sophomore year I considered studying in Russia; after all, I am a Russian major and could really benefit from the time spent immersed in Russian language. As the application deadline drew near, I began to weigh my options. While spending my year in Russia would have been a wonderful opportunity to improve my language skills and confidence, my heart was set on studying again in Istanbul.

So here I am, a month away from my flight and from the beginning of another sort of college experience. I'll be staying with my long time on-again-off-again love interest Kaan (we're off-again, if anyone is interested) in an apartment near one of the campuses of Istanbul Bilgi University. I'll be taking a slew of international relations classes, Advanced Russian, and maybe even Kurdish. The plan is to learn as much as I can, without sacrificing my free time and energy.

Here's why you might find this blog entertaining:
You might be one of my friends or family members perplexed at my continuing travels to Turkey and eager to decode my fledgling curiosity with such a complex country and culture.
You might be a student considering a study abroad experience or one of my fellow travelers looking for a way to stay in touch.
You might find amusing the dynamics between kaan and myself, especially if I go more into depth about him.
You might enjoy my anecdotes of college life, of living in a small apartment with an even smaller Kurdish man in a shady part of town, of trying to maintain a shred of privacy and normalcy in a city of 15 million.
You might even be pleased to watch some youtube vlogs that I hope to film, illustrating not only some of the beauty of Istanbul, but some of the more mundane and ordinary sides of life in the city as well.

So now, who am I?
I'm a third year student at the University of Denver. I'm an International Studies major, Russian language major, and Religious Studies minor. I don't know what I want to do after college. I'm a vegan and intend to stay vegan as long as I can while abroad. I'm a dread head, a nappy girl, and a bit of a hippie. I'm a worrier; I'm currently worried about not having enough money to eat and getting stared at for growing a head of dreads. I'm sure when I get there, I'll start to worry about classes and getting around. I'm beginning to develop a concern about the campus situation; Bilgi has three campuses across the city. I'll be living close to one campus, but what if my classes are at another? Hopefully all will be well.

Some names you might see popping up in this blog:
Margaret, my sister at home in Colorado
Roy, one of my best friends in Colorado
Anthony, another friend in Colorado
Cameron, a friend from DU who will be studying in Russia and China, each for a semester
Kyle, another friend from DU who will be studying in Denmark for a year
Jenn, yet another friend from DU who will be studying in China for a semester

I can't fathom that I'll talk about these people much, but here they are just in case.

In my month remaining, I need to renew my scooter insurance, cancel Netflix, and pay tuition.
I'm leaving tomorrow for Seattle, which may be the birthplace of my new vlog. I'll be there for a week, visiting a friend with whom I went to Turkey in 2006/2007 and getting my dreads maintained by lish.

On that note, I should finish laundry and packing. Stay tuned for more updates as I prepare for my exodus to Turkey, as I battle incompetent airline companies and suitcases that refuse to zip shut, and, of course, the whole purpose of this blog, my impending doomschool year abroad.